Pretending is encouraged in our society.
“Fake it till you make it”
“Put your game face on”
“Don’t let your feelings get in the way”
There are endless lines of encouragement with a subtext communicating the need to ignore the negative, inconvenient hindrances and get to where you’re going.
In some cases, like pressing to work, church, or the gym, and ignoring how you feel is self-discipline. Very important distinction between self-discipline, which is strength, and denial, false strength.
Pretending you don’t have a broken heart after being rejected by someone you cared deeply about is not going to help you. Acting like being stood up is no big deal to ease the sting is dishonest. Saying that the absence of your father has not affected your life negatively does not make it true. You can’t fake away bruises. You can’t game face your way out of already being broken.
Real strength and self-discipline requires the expression of true feelings amidst different situations. Many artists do this through music. Others through their own chosen art form. I have chosen words to express myself and have been tons better for it.
Do not let what you wish to be and strategic appearances of being strong cripple you. Be honest about where you are. Be strong in being vulnerable. Pretending to be strong will only cause your true weakness to blindside you.
Get angry. Get sad. Feel. Cause being true to how you feel is being real.