Over the past week, I have been traveling from Chicago, IL to Escondido, CA. Something I’ve pondered along the way is the wonderful opportunity to embrace the new beginnings. The past will not follow you when you address it and establish closure. Putting a period at the end of a chapter creates the barrier you need to keep the past from dragging behind you like a ball and chain. No need to have constant reminders of things behind you when there’s so much potential moving forward.
Here’s to a fresh start. The DBMH Project is getting new inspiration.
There’s a lot to look FORWARD to. Leave the past behind you.
Here’s to a fresh start. Choose your adventure and walk in it.
Trust is not an easy thing to do after being hurt. Having been betrayed on several occasions in my life, I have found trust to be a gift given with an understanding of mutual respect, honor, and loyalty.
Trust is defined as an assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something or one in which confidence is placed (according to Webster). Trust is a decision. Trust takes time to build and could tumble to the ground in an instant…
We can all reflect on moments like this and it either makes us sad, regretful, or grateful for the end of the failed bond, connection, or love interest. What I want to point out is that while trust is a decision, it is not voluntary ignorance. You can trust someone and still discover new things about them. You can trust someone and be inquisitive. You can trust and be curious about the details.
Assumptions lead to misunderstandings, unnecessary heartbreak, and trouble. Do not assume that I condone lack of trust in questioning the motives of people who love you. I am instead encouraging you to ask questions to uncover truth you never knew before about the people you interact with often or deeply. Asking questions will deepen your relationship and clarify aspects of a person that make it easier for you to trust them with pieces of your heart. Avoiding assumptions helps cancel the possibility of naive suppositions.
Be informed. Love with trust, for there is no love without trust.
We’ve done a few different reflections on love over the past few weeks. First we covered what love is, defining love as unconditional and absolutely giving without exception. Love is a vast subject and we could blog everyday for the rest of the year on qualities and effects of love and hardly make a dent into the true deepness of love. Love is infinite, and yet, the limitless nature of love inspires us to do better, live better, and be better. Love wakes up hope and urges faith to persevere through all obstacles. Love energizes the faint heart to hold on through the darkest of nights for the dawn. Love pushes the wounded to a safe haven of rest and healing. Love inspires generosity from abundance and sharing from loss. Love keeps you moving when countless others have stopped. Love inspires change for the good through patience and kindness.
You never know when the extra effort… the extra ounce of love will tip the scales. You never know who is inspired by the pouring out of your heart into the why behind what you do and how you do it.
Love’s inspirational quality is not a supposition, but a proven science. Love and inspiration go hand and hand. To love is to inspire.
Funny how the urban scene will sing and write more about the brokenness in homes and emptiness of fatherhood than any other genre I’ve heard. My Pandora station will play 3x as many songs that reflect on dads being gone than any other station. Check this one out and let it encourage you to play your part as a mentor, father, or supporter for anyone who faces struggles like this in your world.
we are we are broken people (we are some broken people)
just trying to make it on our own (yet we try to make it)
we are we are broken people (we are some broken people)
and yet we are not alone (only cause of you we’re not alone)
now this aint how it’s supposed to be
cause mom and dad really wasn’t supposed to leave
but now divorce what they chose to seek
and now they see the kids every other week
and this aint how it supposed to end
cause when they started out they was best friends
but how it begins aint how it ends
sometimes that’s how the story spins
what do you do now what do you say
when people drift apart and they walk away
starting over make us all afraid
dealing w/ remorse plus a ton of shame
but there’s a cure for ya ton of pain
there’s hope and healing now in his grace
and there’s a place where you see his face
where he makes beauty out our mistakes
this aint the way the way she went and planned it
but little by little she they took it all for granted
just another story on our little planet
a little compromise break a few commandments
so the baby’s coming she starts to panic
contemplates all her choices and then examines
all the voices trying to tell her just to take advantage
of the fact she could abort it like it never mattered
but she struggles just to understand it
feeling lost confused and a little damaged
she knew his life was the thing that matters
so he grows kind of like a seed that’s planted
it was hard but she always managed
even when the problems never seem to vanish
she looks at his fingers and the little hand prints
she might be broken but shes gonna manage
we are broken cause we are sinful
we are a messed up type of people
just living in a world that’s quite deceitful
but there’s a way out if you let Him lead you
you see he promises to never leave you
everything you’re facing he would be through
its blatant that we really need you
even in our storms we can see you
Unveiled I stand, in the midst of a grand audience of onlookers, feelers, supporters, and my own fear…
Revealed by the ache in my voice, emotions in a haze, my vision unclear.
Naked without the covering of my lies
The lies I told myself to hide
Hide from the reality outside the walls
The walls that stall the people who surround me
from reaching me…who I am beneath
Beneath the façade of carefree
Woe is not the load I carry
But my definition of freedom is limited to the anxiety of being betrayed by somebody
Because no one owes me more than the man who walked away from me
The man who bore me with his own flesh and yet
Alone without him and any hope of ever knowing what trust looks like
Estranged from my faith in possibility
I drown my self in the very thing that keeps my dad away from me
Unveiled you see a different me
A girl who is hurting
Hurting from the years of pretending
Aching from the hole burning deep within me
My inside raw from the searing
Inflamed, deeply bruised, bleeding
Trapped beneath my skin, deep bruising
Remedy in sharing
So, unveiled I stand
Courageous and daring
Fear gripping my hand
Truth falling from my lips
Freeing me from the grip of the past
Vulnerable and powerful
Who I am, unveiled.
Barbra Streisand sang a song to her dad.
The lyrics are touching… I thought I’d share it this week with you all.
Papa, can you see me?
Papa, can you find me in the night?
Papa, are you near me?
Papa, can you hear me?
Papa, can you help me not be frightened?
Looking at the skies
I seem to see a million eyes
Which ones are yours?
Where are you now that yesterday
And closed its doors?
The night is so much darker.
The wind is so much colder
The world I see is so much bigger now that I’m alone.
Papa, please forgive me.
Try to understand me.
Papa, don’t you know I had no choice?
Can you hear me praying,
Anything I’m saying,
Even though the night is filled with voices?
I remember ev’rything you taught me
Ev’ry book I’ve ever read.
Can all the words in all the books
Help me to face what lies ahead?
The trees are so much taller
And I feel so much smaller.
The moon is twice as lonely
And the stars are half as bright.
Papa, how I love you.
Papa, how I need you.
Papa, how I miss you
Kissing me goodnight.