Music Monday Reflection: Heart of the Matter by India.Arie

I know this song refers to a lover, but let me remind you that a little girl’s father is her first love! I have listened to this song on countless occasions wondering if and when my dad ever thought of me.

Not all the lyrics apply, but the portions that do I’ve inserted here for a time of reflecting and thinking about the long lasting impact of bitterness and betrayal if left unchecked.

The verse says:

These times are so uncertain
There’s a yearning undefined
And people filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
And the trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness
They’re the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work they put between us,
You know it doesn’t keep us warm

Why do you suppose we would kill trust and self-assurance?
This yearning undefined is the deeper longing within our souls that people constantly fail to fill. We’ve defined it on the blog as the black hole, an emptiness that feels like a cavity in the chest that no person or thing can satiate.
This is most likely what causes the rage people feel. The frustration of the search for love and happiness that completes their being. Instead of finding the fulfillment in Christ, people resort to their pride and competition that permeates the loneliness as the songwriter points out, “the work they put between us…doesn’t keep us warm.”

The chorus and bridge says,

I’ve been learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I’m learning them again
I’ve been tryin’ to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it’s about forgiveness
Even if, even if you don’t love me anymore

All the people in your life who’ve come and gone
They let you down, you know they hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; cause life goes on
You keep carrin’ that anger, it’ll eat you up inside

I wanna be happily ever after
And my heart is so shattered
But I know it’s about forgiveness
Even if, even if you don’t love me anymore

From daughter to father,
Even if you don’t love me anymore, I know it’s about forgiveness. I put the past behind me and I walk on with life as it moves forward. Anger will only hurt me and destroy the people I could be loving more graciously.

Happy ever after is a choice.
I choose to leave the hurt of the past behind, but not in pride and contempt.
I choose forgiveness so that I leave the baggage right where we packed it.



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About Keila Harris

An MBA graduate with an unparalleled ability to keep a team focused on the goal with clear deliverables to produce for specific results. I am a self-starter. I began a nonprofit organization in 2012 called the DBMH Project, Inc. and then authored a book as well. I love the intersection of business and technology and solving problems alongside colleagues dedicated to their work. I like to focus on growth strategies through SMART goals and accountability. I believe power is in the execution of constant learning and open, humble self-improvement. Therefore I read incessantly and expand my network at every opportunity. #PayItForward #SuccessIsTheJourney

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